So you’ve found yourself in a team conflict and you’d like to bring it to a healthier resolution. You probably realize that a big part of that will be you, the leader, serving as a mediator.
Great, but how do you start? What makes a leader a good mediator of a team conflict?
Key qualities of a successful mediator
Active listening
We have an in-depth guide for becoming a better active listener — in addition to our guide to why you must focus on active listening as a leader.
Here at Leadership Coaching Network, we’re always beating that drum for a reason.
Active listening is undeniably paramount for leaders, forming the very backbone of effective communication and decision-making.
Great leaders know that understanding and empathizing with their team’s pain points, feedback, and suggestions fosters innovation, trust, and loyalty.
By engaging in active listening, the most effective leaders create a healthy work environment where collaboration thrives and employees feel valued, resulting in higher levels of performance and productivity.
Moreover, active listening equips leaders with the necessary insights to strategize and make informed decisions, as they can better gauge the team’s strengths and weaknesses.
Active listening enables leaders to provide valuable guidance and address concerns promptly.
Of course, it also makes you a killer conflict mediator!
Emotional intelligence
We’ve written quite a bit about emotional intelligence and the importance of growing in this area for leaders.
We have also outlined some ways to grow in emotional intelligence, so we won’t rehash all of that here.
Suffice it to say, for leaders, emotional intelligence is crucial in mediating conflicts because it helps them to both understand and manage their own emotions and recognize and empathize with the emotions of others.
Those two areas are absolutely key to being a good mediator in a team conflict.
Clear and concise communication
Say what you mean. The origin of many conflicts is unclear or unstated expectations — which means you really ned to be clear and concise in your communication when you’re stepping into a team conflict.
That doesn’t mean you can be a jerk, but it does mean you need to clearly state your point, even if it ruffles some feathers.
Ultimately, those involved in the conflict will thank you.
You’re also modeling this kind of good communication for the others involved in the conflict.
Key qualities of a successful mediation
So, now you know what makes for a good mediator, but what makes for good mediation?
Begin by implementing these four aspects of healthy conflict mediation.
Win-win negotiation
Win-win negotiations focus on identifying common ground and shared interests between parties, ensuring that both parties feel satisfied with the outcome.
In order to do this effectively, it is essential to actively listen to both parties, reflecting what you are hearing so that both parties can hear an objective restatement of what is being expressed.
When one party explains their complaint, you can restate it in your own words and ask for both parties to confirm that you have accurately understood and restated the issue.
This rhythm of statement and restatement can also help prevent the session from becoming heated and emotional.
Understanding each party’s needs is a crucial element in a win-win negotiation. By taking the time to learn about the other party’s goals, concerns, and priorities, negotiators can craft solutions that are acceptable to all involved.
Still, for a real win-win negotiation to take place, you have to establish ground rules.
Establish ground rules
Discussions often devolve into argument when there are no clear rules laid down for how the conversation will go.
To prevent this, establish ground rules at the beginning of the mediation session. Some useful ground rules might include:
- No interrupting when someone is speaking
- No personal attacks or disrespectful language
- Stay focused on the issue at hand and avoid going off on tangents
- Each party should have an equal opportunity to speak and be heard
Make sure that all parties involved agree to adhere to these rules and remind them throughout the session if necessary.
Facilitate open communication
Open communication — when operating within the ground rules you established — is key to effective mediation.
In this case, open communication means encouraging each party to express their thoughts, feelings, and concerns honestly and respectfully.
To facilitate open communication, consider doing the following:
- Create a safe and supportive environment for all parties to speak up
- Encourage participants to use “I” statements to express their feelings and experiences
- Ask open-ended questions to stimulate discussion and avoid leading questions that imply a specific answer
- Be patient and allow for silence, giving participants time to gather their thoughts and respond
If you see that one party is being regularly steamrolled by the other, make sure to stop the more talkative party and allow the quieter person express him/herself.
Furthermore, if you see that there seems to be emotion or her that is going unstated by one of the parties, you can express your observation and invite comment.
Foster collaboration and joint problem-solving
The ultimate goal of mediation is to help the conflicting parties find a mutually agreeable solution.
In order to resolve the conflict, you want to make it clear that both parties are working together toward solving the problem.
To encourage this kind of collaboration:
- Focus on identifying shared goals and interests at work in the conflict
- Encourage parties to brainstorm solutions together, emphasizing cooperation and teamwork
- Acknowledge and validate the ideas and contributions of all parties, promoting a sense of shared ownership of the solution
In addition, once you have reached a proposed solution, make sure both parties are in agreement with moving forward.
Often in conflicts both parties will be somewhat displeased with a solution, as it will require both parties to give and take a bit. However, that is both expected and even good.
Conclusion
If you’ve been a team leader for more than a few months, you’ve probably experienced the reality of team conflict.
It’s unavoidable, and can actually even be a good thing. But, that requires you being a good mediator!
By developing your emotional intelligence, practicing clear and concise communication, and utilizing the key qualities of successful mediation, such as win-win negotiation, establishing ground rules, facilitating open communication, and fostering collaboration and joint problem-solving, you can effectively mediate conflicts within your team.
Remember, effective conflict resolution not only solves immediate issues but also strengthens relationships, builds trust, and promotes a healthy team dynamic in the long run.
Embrace your role as a mediator and strive to continuously improve your skills to better serve your team and ensure its success.
Do you want to grow in your skills as a mediator or work through a current conflict? Reach out to our team for your free coaching consultation today!